Wednesday, September 10, 2008

I've Moved!

My blog has moved! Contact me if you would like to know the new link to it!

Friday, September 5, 2008

I Wish...

Gee, I really wish I could blog about my favorite class EVER! *sigh*

Thursday, September 4, 2008

Dear Mom...

Is my new blog done yet? I just can't seem to bring myself to write until it's done...

Sunday, August 17, 2008

I Blog For ME

I realize that I have not written for a long time. And that I don't write as much as I would like. I came to the realization today that PART of the reason why I am not writing as much is because of my audience. I don't want to be writing for people, I want to be writing for myself, as a record of what is going on in my life and my thoughts and feelings about it. And almost every time I sit down to write, I am writing knowing that certain people will be reading it. And some of those certain people are holding me back from totally expressing my mind through my own blog. I don't know what I want to do, but I hate the fact that I feel like I have to edit what I type because I don't want certain people knowing about certain things.

On a good note, I got to hang out with the quads this weekend. These are my 3 best friends from high school, and I love how we have kept our friendship alive the past 2 years, and that every time we get together we can just laugh in each others company and pick up where we left off last. I am truly truly thankful that God put those girls in my life. They have taught me a lot about life, and about myself as well.

However, I am also very very excited to be back in my home in Colorado Springs with my 3 roommates again. We always have so much fun and encourage each other so much, and I think we have all missed each other tremendously this summer. It will be an exciting week having everyone together back in the house again!

It is kind of like a new start for me too. This new school year, I mean. I don't plan to be involved in the Navigators at all this year, and I am anxious to see where God leads me. Whether that be high school ministry or something else. I just know know that two of my major prayers for this year are: 1. Where does God want me come end of May? Come end of graduation? 2. Where would God like me to minister (over seas?) next summer? Feel free to join me in these prayers =) I am anxious to hear stories of my friends who all traveled over seas this past summer. I do believe that God is calling me to serve in other countries, but I want to be where HE wants me, not just where I would like to go. I am open to wherever He wants to send me, I just hope He will show me.

Anyway, that's enough for today. It's time to get back to my book =)

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

I L.O.V.E You

I know that I said I would write once a week this summer, but looks like I just can't get around to doing it. I don't want to say that summer is too busy to sit down and write a blog, but in a way it feels like it is. But busy with pleasurable enjoyable activities rather than the usual stress building crap which usually takes up my time. This summer has been so much fun so far, and even though I get to go to Alaska in 2 days I am sad a little bit because tomorrow night is my last night living with Meagan. Her and I have had so much fun together this summer and I'm sad that it is coming to an end. At the beginning of summer we made a list of fun activities we would like to do, and we have done almost all of them now. If it weren't for her I would come home from work everyday and probably just sit in front of the tv the rest of the night, but since Meagan isn't a fan of tv her and I do more fun summer activities. I didn't get to read the bible with her as much as I would have liked this summer. And I know it's partly my fault but through my prayer time I feel like God is showing me that this summer living with her hasn't been a complete waste either. God will do what He wants in her life, and I'm just glad I get to be there for her! It's not like we are saying goodbye forever, we just won't be living together anymore.

But on another note, I am going to Alaska in 2 days and I am very, VERY excited! I'm looking forward to this vacation not just for getting a week off of work but because I'm going to a place I have never been before, and I think it's going to be so much fun. I am super stoked to see Moose!

Emily is back from Laos, and from the little I have talked to her, her mission trip was beyond great, which my roommates and I are thrilled to hear. I am so glad she is back though, and I can't wait until she comes home because she was very much missed this summer!

Anyway, I don't really have a whole lot to say. It's nice to just lay in bed and write and feel comfortable writing without the heat getting to me. Maybe that's why I haven't written that much this summer, because it's too hot to sit down and write. But not tonight. Tonight is cool and breezy and it's going to be a good sleeping night! The little girls I babysit both told me that they loved me today. At first I thought it was weird when they said this because I am not a parent or anything to them, and then I just thought it was cute because they are just little girls. But I can see it on their face that they really mean it, and when I say it back to them I really mean it too. It's weird and I can't really explain it but I love those 2 little girls almost more than anything else in my life right now. I can't even imagine the love between a mom and her kids, being even more strong than the love between me and the girls. I love to just look at their little faces when they snuggle up next to me, I don't know what I would do if anything ever happened to one of them. I do love them a lot. And I am so thankful that God put them in my life, even if it is just for a summer-which I'm hoping it will be longer! It's frustrating for me sometimes when I don't have a boyfriend, and I'm not in a relationship with a guy, but it is nice to know that you are loved by other people. And I think God is showing me to be content in who I am right now, and showing me that I am being loved all around me, mostly by Anneliese and Claire =)

Sunday, June 29, 2008

A Summer of Healing

I love how the Lord gives you what you need in exactly the right amounts. Lately, I've been learning to believe God, instead of just merely believing in Him. He has shown me so much this summer. More this summer than I ever think He has in my entire life. But then again I think I am actively seeking and pursuing Him and listening to Him more this summer than I ever have before. And it's great! God is giving me the kind of faith that I have never have, and definitely taking away my unbelief. One of the verses I've been praying through this Summer is Mark 9:23-24 which is talking about asking God to overcome and take away our unbelief. I can definitely see how God is changing my heart this summer and giving me the faith to believe that He is who He says He is and that He can do what He says He can do. I can't believe I ever doubted Him!

This has definitely been a summer for healing as well. I'm typically a bitter person and like to hold grudges for a little bit but I have learned this summer that when I do that then my attention is not on God, and that's not what He wants from me. So I have learned to just let go of a lot of things. One being a guy that I know I gave a little too much of my heart to in the past. God has helped me overcome him and those feelings and I believe He is now preparing my heart for the guy I could (hopefully) potentially marry someday. Another thing God has helped me overcome is the bitter feelings towards my old roommate. There was a lot of hurt on my part with that whole living situation, the controlling and manipulation that she did to me hurt me more than I realized, but God has completely taken it off my heart. It's one thing to say that and another to feel it, but when I learned that she had done another control issue thing by deleting me as friends on myspace and facebook I didn't get mad like my old self normally would. I felt no bitterness at all, and it finally feels good knowing I'm relieved of the whole situation. Apart from all the earthly things that God has been working on in my life, it's been a summer for healing God and my relationship. I didn't even realize until I started doing this bible study that I had issues that needed to be fixed in our relationship, but together we are working through those and I love being able to put my complete faith in Jesus as we work through it together. I finished the book the Shack the other night, and I enjoyed it thoroughly! I believe that is one of the tools in which God gave me to help me see things more clearly between Him and I. I would recommend it to anybody!

One more thing before I wrap this up. Things with Meagan are great and just keep getting better and better! The other night we sat down and read the bible together. She told me what she liked and didn't like about it, so we are now going to take a different approach to the bible so that she is able to get more out of it. She read The Shack as well and really liked it, I hope God spoke to her through it. But one of the best feelings and moments this summer, and it's happened a couple of times now, is when I wake up and walk out of my room to use the restroom, I see Meagan in her room by herself reading her bible that I gave her. It's such a good feeling! I love that she is curious and looking for God to be at least a little bit present in her life! Prayers are definitely being answered this summer!

Sunday, June 22, 2008

Tiffany's Wedding

I can finally relax a little! Tiffany's wedding is finally over, and not in a bad way. That day has been working up for 9 months now and it finally came. It was such a busy and crazy week for me, working 25 hours and then going everywhere all the time for wedding stuff. But I felt very honored to be doing everything for her. The wedding itself was not what I expected at all, but at the same time very nice. It was the most unorganized, laid back wedding I have ever seen, which made it nice for everybody I thought. They only had their closest family and friends at the wedding (40 people tops) which made it less intimidating for people like me who don't like to get in front of people. And Tiffany looked absolutely beautiful! It makes me excited for my own wedding someday. The wedding itself was actually very fun, I enjoyed myself a lot there. But what I loved most about the whole week was spending time with Tiffany's family. She has the kind of family with like 10 crazy aunts, and they were all out in Colorado for the big day. They were all just so fun to be around, especially at the rehearsal dinner where everybody went to the Colorado Springs Sky Sox (baseball) game. That was my favorite part of the whole week. Being at a baseball game sitting on a private patio so you don't have to deal with the crowd, and being with enjoyable people just made everything so relaxed and pleasurable. I wish I could do it again.

I am however relieved that the wedding is over. It took a lot of time, money, and energy from me this past week, and was very stressful. Now that it's over I can just kick back and worry about nothing, and do nothing except go play with my little girls.

Meagan and I are reading The Shack together right now, and it's a very very good book! I can't wait to get to the end of it. We are also starting TODAY to read our bible together. That was the plan all along but it's been a month since we have lived together and we have not gotten in the Word yet, so we decided we are starting that today. I'm excited! And also very excited for this stress-free week where I have no responsibilities other than going to babysit. And only 2 more weeks until I can go home, for the 4th of July, and I am very excited to see my family and puppy.